Walking by Faith

I confess that, at times in my life, I have been a lukewarm Christian. I confess that, at times in my life, I have deliberately ignored and rebelled against God. So I can say with certainty that seeking God and walking by faith in Him is undoubtedly better than any alternative I have tried in my past.

Now, I am not saying that I have it all figured out, or that I make no mistakes - I see myself clearly as a fallen sinner - but I stand firm on grace and faith in Jesus Christ, and that makes all the difference.

Walking by faith is hard sometimes. I pray for God to show me my sinful nature, to refine me, and He does. I pray for humility and I am faced with my raging pride. I pray for wisdom and He shows me that my knowledge and understanding is so minute. I pray for compassion and He shows me my judgmental attitudes. And I am thankful, eventually.

Unfortunately, my raging pride and my judgmental attitude still seem to be my default when faced with certain situations. I definitely can recognize this impulsive response earlier now than in the past, and can pray for grace and wisdom and receive it, but there still are times when it is hours or days later that I see how my pride once again rose its ugly head. Thank God that His grace is never ending!

Ultimately it comes down to the cross. That is what I didn't understand as a lukewarm Christian or as a rebel against God. It's why I didn't understand the incredible miracle of the Gospel. Even though I grew up hearing about the cross, I didn't get it. And now I do. The cross is everything and the only thing.

When I focus on the cross, I am faced with my sin, my pride, my greed, my rebellion against God. I am ashamed of my sin and recognize that I have nothing to expect or deserve but death; being outcast from His presence. But as I cower at the base of the cross, feeling so worthless and unworthy, is when I get it - really get it. God's grace, God's love, God's forgiveness is there to surround me, pick me up, hold me, carry me, teach me, walk with me, lead me, and bathe me in renewed life. This is the message of the cross for me. Yes, it is there to convict me of my sin and show me how far away I am on my own from God; but it is there first and foremost to show me how much God loves me, how much He cares for me, how much He is willing to sacrifice for me.

I realize that this is the message that is told over and over again in the Bible. It is the message that is preached from pulpits and printed in thousands of books. But all these words meant nothing to me until I truly let this message into my heart. I am without a doubt a new creation. Without a doubt forgiven. Without a doubt saved. Without a doubt loved. And that is why I trust God completely, and I know that I can walk by faith never doubting that He has good things for me down the journey of my life. And I am grateful.