Look of Love

I've heard said that looking at a groom when he sees his bride for the first time is a favorite moment at a wedding. I believe that seeing a man support and love his partner and share in the joy of their child's birth is one of my favorite moments of attending births. Recently, I was able to share in one of these most sacred and precious moments.

The couple is young, early 20's, and have been married 2 years. They are both quiet, shy and humble. They were expecting their firstborn, a son. Her labor began on her estimated due date around 5 AM. Contractions grew stronger and closer together and she came to the hospital about 6 PM. She was 5 cm and laboring beautifully. She and her husband both come from families with long histories of natural childbirth and they planned for the same. Her husband was the only family member with her during her labor, as they desired, and he was the perfect labor companion. He walked with her, supported her during stronger contractions, rubbed and provided pressure on her back for many hours, and quietly spoke encouragement to her when she questioned how much longer she could continue. His hand and face were what she sought when she needed the extra support. His eyes glowed with love as he stayed by her side and provided what she needed. They met in Brazil, her home country, and occasionally they would quietly speak Portuguese. She would fall into her native tongue when her fatigue was greatest. Around 2 AM she was 8-9 cm and continued to labor beautifully. She hoped her baby would be born very soon, but that was not meant to be. At 6:15 AM she began to change positions to help her baby come down the birth path and make his grand entrance, which he did at 8:30 AM. What joy and exaltation when she first looked at his face, held him in her arms and heard his cry! That birth is a miracle is no understatement! As they welcomed their precious son, with tears in their eyes, they quietly shared words that I will cherish in my heart. He told her over and over again how amazing she was and how proud he was of her. He told her that he was so proud that she did it, that she delivered their son. She replied that THEY did it, and it was so heartfelt and tender that tears welled in my eyes too. Such a precious family, such a loved wife, husband and son. How humbling to be able to witness these moments!

Slinky

Today I used the slinky as an analogy for the vagina. It's a little odd and quite funny to me, but I think it works. Let me explain...


My client was a first time mom, a few weeks away from her due date, and very worried about how "parts that she really likes are about to get destroyed" by the birth of her baby. I kept trying to tell her how our bodies are made to labor and birth naturally but she was having none of it. My usual responses were not cutting it. There was a poster on the exam room wall that diagrams the female reproductive tract. I start pointing out the structure of the vagina and the rugae - the many folds along its length - and how they are designed to unfold, open and allow the baby to pass through. And that's when the slinky popped in my head. So I told her to think about a slinky - how it is compact and can stretch out to great length then return to the same compact size and not be destroyed. It seemed to work, and I have a new analogy!